How To Use Extraordinary Adjectives To Add Flavorful Color To Your Blog Posts On Your Golf Course Website


augusta_national_hole_12Like you, I listen to sports radio all the time, every time I’m driving and sometimes when I’m home. The day after the Masters, I knew Jim Rome would exaggerate everything there is to exaggerate about the exaggeration of the other sports people’s writings about Jordan Spieth’s meltdown at the 12th hole at Augusta National….and so he did.

That guy (Rome) and all the other sports guys have gotten so good at talking about sports in a way that makes listeners think about everything there is to think about except sports, that I can’t wait until the next time I have to use the car to do an errand so I can listen in and learn all the latest bombastic exaggerative remarks.

The incredible exaggerations about the Spieth meltdown on 12 at Augusta were very ironic in that those sports guys went so far out of their way to point out another sports guy’s take on what happens next for Spieth that the reporting of the meltdown, with all its inflated views about how badly this would effect him, was nothing compared to the vividly popular sportscaster I was listening to on his take of the other sports guy’s take on Spieth.

I think it’s Rome who likes to use “really?” with a long pause before he says “really?” and a long pause afterwards to compound the effect he figures he’ll have on his audience. There’s also a gruff-voiced fellow who is much more vociferously mundane than Rome, but his voice is enough to grab the attention of anyone who happens to accidentally tune into that station while looking for Mozart or Beethoven.

Are you starting to get the idea of how to use adjectives, some appropriate and some totally inappropriate, to make your golf course website blog posts sound better? If not, scroll back up to my 2nd paragraph of this ridiculously uninformative post. (Notice I just said “ridiculously uninformative” so that you would understand how non-ridiculous and how informative this post really is since we live in an age of “opposites for effect”) to the part where I said “bombastic exaggerative” remarks. Notice how the word “bombastic” is used inappropriately here because there was nothing braggartly (that’s what bombastic means, I think) about Rome’s remarks. Also, the word “exaggerative” probably isn’t even a real word, but that doesn’t matter and in fact might be better than if you used real words.

So to summarize… for your horrendously shameless watered-down version of a golf post for your beautiful blue and green golf course website, just use a lot of adjectives…(and maybe even throw in a few neat adverbs too) and make sure that only some of it makes sense. That way your rapid-learning readers will come back for more and more of your pitiful posts which will be stuffed with clever keywords that the gargantuan Google won’t even realize it’s ranking your pages higher than your corny cocky competitor’s content which currently rank higher than your cool content!!! :)

April 13, 2016 |

One thought on “How To Use Extraordinary Adjectives To Add Flavorful Color To Your Blog Posts On Your Golf Course Website

  1. My heartfelt helpful hints to you are: Don’t play bubble poker all the time; Bluff preflop once in awhile and if you are caught, immediately bluff again.Sometimes deliberately rely on on luck like a donkey.When someone talks to you, reply in a nonsensicle way. Pretend that you are drunk and from out of town. Talk about the prostitute that you just [expletive deleted by moderator]. Make repulsive noises. And make crazy faces. Always giggle when you scoop the chips. Touch people. Pretend that you are older than you are by shaking your hands and spilling chips. If you know someone pretend that you don’t and pretend that you do know someone that you don’t. Pick the angriest person at your table and make them angrier. GOOD LUCK

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